8:26 AM: I mentioned to Roseanne Barr yesterday that I walked 99.9 miles on my vacation. She apparently found this relevant enough to tell Wanda Sykes this morning. So when I walked in to the office, Wanda Sykes looked at me, shook her ass and sang, “I got 99 problems but a bitch ain’t one!” and high-fived me.
10:53 AM: Grace popped into Phil Dunphy’s Lame Cousin’s office to ask a few questions and wrapped up by saying, “Okay, then! I’ll finish this up and if you don’t see me at my desk for a while, that’s because I’ll be hiding away somewhere with a printed copy of this document doing my editing!”
There was a long pause before Phil Dunphy’s Lame Cousin said, “Well, I assume that will be after the meeting you and I have scheduled with [me] starting in 7 minutes.”
“Oh, right!” she said.
2:40 PM: Just walked through the lobby of our office as our current Director of IT (Roseanne Barr’s boss who recently submitted his resignation) was finishing up a meeting. I heard him saying “Well, if you know of any companies looking for a director of IT, let me know because I’ll be looking…”
3:13 PM: Grace is proofreading a document at her desk and just said aloud, “Oh, okay. I screwed up.” This is an evergreen statement that should be said at the end of every day.