8:54 AM: Yesterday, Roseanne Barr’s friend Maureen, who works on the other side of the office brought in some Irish soda bread that her husband baked. Roseanne Barr did not like it. She called Maureen at her desk and said “Why’s it different? It doesn’t taste right.” Apparently Maureen’s husband is on a health kick and used wheat flour. Roseanne Barr was pissed. She had really been looking forward to this.
So today, she brings in a loaf of Irish soda bread that she made the right way. She keeps telling everyone “Well, Maureen isn’t in today. If she were here, I wouldn’t have brought this in because I don’t want to hurt her feelings. But that bread she brought in yesterday just wasn’t any good. You can’t use wheat flour in something like this.”
Yes, you “wouldn’t want to hurt Maureen’s feelings,” but you’ll tell everyone how awful that soda bread was.