Day #742

8:45 AM: Someone came to Phyllis’s desk and mentioned a bit of work he did over the weekend. Phyllis interrupted him and said, “You shouldn’t be working on the weekends. God doesn’t want you to. Neither do I.”

Does she say this to everyone on the weekends? If she goes to the grocery store on Saturday and the cashier hands her a receipt, does she then tell the cashier that she shouldn’t be working on the weekends? How far does this go? 

11:22 AM: Carson Kressley and Phyllis are going to lunch with Phil Dunphy’s Lame Cousin, Gordon Ramsay and some representatives from a vendor…

Carson Kressley: What time are we leaving for lunch?

Phyllis: 11:30 I think.

Carson Kressley: Well, we have that meeting at 2.

Phyllis: WHAT MEETING AT 2?!!??!

Carson Kressley: Oh, maybe you’re not in this meeting. About template discussions.

Phyllis: No, I’m not in that meeting.

Carson Kressley: Okay, I thought you might be.

Phyllis: No. I’m not offended. I’ve got too much stuff to do.

If Phyllis has more than one thing on her calendar, you better believe she’s got “no time.”

11:42 AM: Phyllis and Carson Kressley are preparing for their journey to lunch. Gordon Ramsay walked out of his office…

Carson Kressley: Are we walking there? Or are we Ubering? Taking a cab?

Gordon Ramsay: Up to you. We could leave now and start walking, or take two cabs so we don’t all need to squeeze in to one. I’m going to run to the restroom and meet you in the lobby.

Gordon Ramsay left and Carson Kressley started whispering to Phyllis:

Carson Kressley: Did you hear that? He said we might WALK?!

Phyllis: WALK?! No, surely not.

Carson Kressley: How cold is it out there?

Phyllis: Cold.

The Weather Channel says its 22 degrees. According to Google, it’s a 0.6 mile walk. Phil Dunphy’s Lame Cousin came out of his office…

Phil Dunphy’s Lame Cousin: What’s your plan?

Carson Kressley: Well, Gordon Ramsay said we might be… walking….

Phil Dunphy’s Lame Cousin: Okay.

Carson Kressley: It’s just cold.

Phil Dunphy’s Lame Cousin: It’s not that long of a walk though.

Carson Kressley: I’m just wondering if I should put my boots on.

Phil Dunphy’s Lame Cousin: Well, Gordon Ramsay asked us to be dressed in business casual for this lunch, so your boots might not fit that dress code.

Carson Kressley: But if we’re walking… My shoes will be under the table, so no one will see them.

Phil Dunphy’s Lame Cousin: I think we’re in the city and most of these buildings will have shoveled the snow.

Now Phyllis is standing in her cubicle applying layer upon layer of clothing…

Phyllis: The entire parking lot at the train station was one big sheet of ice.

Carson Kressley: No one salted any sidewalks in my neighborhood. These boots are great in the snow, but not on the ice.

Phyllis: Yeah! And I’m looking at these people in their high-heeled boots and thinking “really?!”

They left. Carson Kressley wore his professional shoes. I’m sure he’ll return from this journey bruised and bloodied.


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